Not a good mama!
As you all know, I was expecting baby #2 over the Christmas holidays. That baby made his arrival on Christmas Eve. Things have been quite hectic since then and are finally starting to settle down. It has been interesting getting used to life with a toddler and a newborn but I think I have finally figured some of it out.
One of the things I have been trying to get used to is all of the attention my 3 year old wants now. She was always so independent and now she demands that we do everything with her, including taking her to the potty. If I can’t give her the attention that she wants or she is upset because she has gotten in trouble for trying to get the “wrong” kind of attention, she resorts to calling me a “Bad Mama”. Talk about tearing my heart out and doing a dance on it! The first time she said it, I was just a few days home and very, very sleep deprived. Hubby was home and was doing his best to do all the household chores and watch our Princess but she decided it was me she wanted when I was trying to sleep. I promised her that after a small nap, I would play with her but she was very upset at this answer, and she hit me with that horrible phrase. I broke out into tears! Now granted I was post-partum and my hormones were a mess but it hurt so bad to hear it. It actually made me question if I really was a bad mom!
I know the first week home, I probably could have been a little more attentive but I really felt that I needed to sleep as much as I could while I had hubby home for my physical and mental health. I now know that by getting that sleep, I was being a good mom. A sleep deprived mom, can tend to overreact to situations (ie breaking into tears at being called a bad mama). Now on another note, Bella saw how much it bothered me that she called me that, so now when she doesn’t get her way, I again am a “Bad Mama”. I have sat her down and explained how it hurts my feelings when she says that, but I am not sure I am getting through to her.
I do get told that she loves me more than that I am bad, but it is still hurtful. It just makes me wonder what the future holds when she becomes a teenager?!? I keep waiting for the day that she decides to tell me she doesn’t love me anymore. She has also started hitting and pushing recently and even yelling at me. I have politely explained that she will not get her way by acting that way and then is promptly given a time out. I know that this is just a reaction to her upset feelings and we all say and do things we don’t mean when we are angry, but I would love to find away to get her to show how upset she is in a nicer way. Do any of you lovely readers have any suggestions?