My brother the dad
My brother and I are very different from each other. I’m a city girl, he’s a country boy. I like to vacation at a beachside resort, he’s into wilderness camping. We were such opposites growing up and he frustrated me because, even though I loved him unconditionally, I didn’t always understand the person he was.
The idea of my brother being a parent seemed so foreign to me. I knew that he wanted to have children, to raise a family but for some reason, perhaps because he was my baby brother, I was never able to wrap my head around him being an adult.
A little over three years ago my brother and his wife began their journey into parenthood by having twins. A beautiful little boy and an amazing little girl. From almost the moment he became a father, my brother amazed me.
He took to fatherhood like a fish to water.
Growing up our arguments were born out of his stubbornness, his lack of patience and his need for everything to fit into a unique little box. All nuances that don’t exist in his relationships with his children. He has a patience that astounds me. He is calm and kind with them. He encourages them to make decisions and supports their choices when they do. He takes them for walks exploring the world through the eyes of three year olds. He takes them to playgroups so that they have the chance to play with other children. He understands them in a way that many fathers don’t ever take the time to figure out.
My brother and sister in law have been fortunate enough to arrange their schedules so that one of them can be home with their kids. My brother takes the first shift and then after a long draining day with two toddlers he’s off to his manual labour job in the afternoon. It’s exhausting as their day starts in the early morning hours and it doesn’t end until he drops into bed after his shift ends at midnight. To top it off they live across country with no family to help out with the chaos. Yet he never complains. This is his life and his children make it all worth it.
This is the same kid who would fight with me like we were starring in our own WWF match on a daily basis. This is the same kid who I often accused of being irresponsible and irrational. This same kid, my brother, has turned into a kind, loving, nurturing father. He has surprised me. This may not be what I was expecting of him but I am so unbelievably proud of the man he has become and more so of the father he has grown into.
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Kim Noakes