Comments on: Not a good mama!

By: Andrea Gougeon

Andrea Gougeon — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 22:59:00 +0000

I want another but am frightened this will happened I already have times where I feel like a “Bad Momma” hearing my beautiful son say it might be too much for me

By: Ikram El Fadil

Ikram El Fadil — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 20:42:00 +0000

I don’t have two children and I’m sure it’s hurtful to be called that by your own child. It’s all crazy hormones. It was interesting to read. Good article!

By: Ikram El Fadil

Ikram El Fadil — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 20:42:00 +0000

I don’t have two children and I’m sure it’s hurtful to be called that by your own child. It’s all crazy hormones. It was interesting to read. Good article!

By: Brandy_Kubig

Brandy_Kubig — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 01:41:00 +0000

I know this was a while ago and I hope you have things figured out by now… but I too asked my daughter (I also have a 3 year old daughter and my son was born beginning of October) to help with little things like getting me a diaper ect and I also ask my son to wait when doing things with my daughter and I find it works. I tell my daughter all the time how much her brother loves her, “look he is smiling at you”, “you make him so happy”. I find this makes her feel so important. My daughter also resorted to saying mean things to me when she was upset or saying she only wanted daddy… but with a little patience she has stopped that. I did tell her it hurt my feelings but I did not punish her for this behaviour, I think that would still be her getting the attention she is wanting but in a bad way. I do really praise her when she does goo things and this seems to have worked. She hasn’t told me she doesn’t like me in about a month!!! lol I know it does hurt though. My husband also sent my daughter and me out on a few “date nights” just the two of us and that seems to help as well. They really need to know that they are important too!!

By: Carla

Carla — Thu, 23 Feb 2012 22:26:00 +0000

Great to read about this post as i’m expecting baby #2 in the summer. This is my biggest fear! My daughter will be 20 months when the baby comes, and i just hope that i’m still able to be there for her as much as possible, when dealing with the new baby and adapting to a new schedule. SCARY!

By: Janice

Janice — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 12:01:00 +0000

I have certainly run into this issue. My oldest is 3 and youngest is now 7 months. It is getting better and there is less and less of the “bad mommy” being said. Time helps. From my perspective, it hasn’t really bothered me that she was saying that because I know that is just her way of saying she is upset with the situation and needs attention. Hubby is really great about taking the little one when our oldest needs my attention. I try to take some time out of the day to spend with her each day. I have found that it is helpful for her and I to take her to daycare twice a week because she gets the independence that is important at this age and it enables me to spend time with the baby (without feeling guilty about not being attentive enough to my oldest) and to get things done (chores, errands, etc.) We both enjoy the time we spend together even more now. It is truly a balancing act to manage both kids and the household.

By: Angela

Angela — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 01:01:00 +0000

That’s some great advice. We do try to get her involved in helping but sometimes she just doesn’t want to. She actually asked me why she has to do everything. LOL. I will try asking the baby to wait while I take care of the Princess. Maybe that will help:)

By: Guest

Guest — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 20:36:00 +0000

My daughter was 2 1/2 years old when we brought home our second daughter and we went through the same thing. What I found worked really well was to ask her to help with her baby sister. All while she was helping I would load on the compliments about how great a helper and big sister she was. I found this gave her a sense of importance in what was otherwise a crazy time of change for everyone in our household. I also found that if the baby was crying, but I was with my older daughter I would “ask” the baby to wait while I finished what I was doing with my eldest! Sounds a little crazy, as we know the baby doesn’t understand, but I think it made my older daughter feel like her time was valuable as well, instead of her always having to wait for me to address the baby’s needs. In closing I will say that even after nine months we are still have some moments of jealousy and fights for attention, however watching my now three year old dance and hearing her sister laughing away at it had made it all more then worthwhile!