My Ford Family with my Zodiac.

So when Ford offered to loan me their new Explorer for a family trip to Vermont it seemed like a perfect fit. (To be honest, I would have preferred the Mustang, but it’s not exactly kid friendly.) Right now we drive a minivan. It seats seven and my wife doesn’t like driving it — it’s too big. So I was hoping our trip to Vermont for a week of skiing and beer would be made smooth and easy with the Explorer. We had the kids in the back with all their stuff: DVD players, colouring books, Nintendo DS, blah, blah, blah and off we went in the wee hours of Saturday morning. But I’m not here to tell you of the car sickness and the tantrums the kids had, I’m here to tell you about mine.

On the ferry!

The car was a great drive. It has electric stowaway seats, which beats lifting the super heavy ones out the back of the van, electrical outlets for all of the kids stuff and satellite radio. (My wife LOVED the satellite radio.) But it seems to me that the more technical a car gets, the more frustrating it can be.

We encountered a few problems:

Problem Number 1 — Car Seats. My kids are 4 & 6. I installed the car seats no problem the day before we left. The morning we left, as my kids sleepily got into their seats, the seat belts wouldn’t reach because big console between the seats restricted my hand getting in. So every time we got in the car the entire vacation it was a big deal getting them into their seats. We take for granted that we can get right into the back seats in our mini van. A huge convenience with little ones.

Problem Number 2 – Cruise Control. On long journeys, I love cruise control. I’m able to set my speed, relax my feet and I can estimate the time of arrival. Set it & forget it. No no. The cruise control kept slipping out and then accelerating without warning. When it finally stabilised, the sensors stopped working. The one thing on the car that I wanted to work didn’t. Give me back my mini van!

Problem Number 3 – GPS. The GPS was built into the car, which is great, but it couldn’t find the resort we were staying at. Luckily we were prepared with an actual paper map.

Lost in the land of snow.

It was fantastic to have the kids closer to us in the vehicle, it made it much easier for my wife to cater to their needs. And there were a lot of them! The kids loved that their windows opened, something that they are not used to in our mini van. It was also great to have a GPS built in to the car. The screen was easy to read and knowing where we were and what was coming up ahead was an advantage when we were driving through unfamiliar territory.

Overall, it was a great drive. It’s a great looking car and maybe after a sit down with the manual and a couple of drinks I would know how to maximize the features. Maybe when my kids get a little older it will be an option for us. Until then, I think it’s time to test drive the Ford Flex because my wife keeps bustin’ me for one!

A bottle of Louis the XIII de Remy Martin $2,000.00

A Bugatti $1,000,000.00

A British Premier League Soccer team? $400,000,000.00

Seriously, I’m not difficult to please, and I don’t expect much when it comes to gifts.

Here are my top five under $50:

1)   The Callet – for my new iPhone 4, which I don’t have yet ($25).

2) T-shirts – I live in t-shirts… I especially like the fit, feel and cheekiness of French Connection UK ones. Like this one ($38):

2)   Chocolate. A large box. Preferrably Lindt or Cadbury from the UK – no crappy waxy stuff. I think I could really enjoy these (approx. $25):

3)   Anything Liverpool like this ($15):

4)   Just regular white socks, because I’m fussy with fabric on my hands and feet. You can get a six pack for about $16:

What I’d really like is priceless and unattainable: I’d love for my kids to sleep on their own, every night, in their own rooms. Down the hall from me.

Merry Christmas!

You get a big mess. And Do It All Daddy comes to the rescue!

We had a great weekend at the cottage, even if it was too cold for the beach and too wet to go outside. Instead we spent the day watching 101 Dalmatians, Little Mermaid, Bolt and Snow White. The sun decided to come out as we were leaving, and the drive home was full of complaining.

As we are half way home, my two year old decides to puke her brains out all over herself, her car seat, the actual seat and the carpet.

I pull to the side of the road, jump out (luckily I had a roll of Bounty in the car and my wife had packed some extra clothing) and began cleaning up the mess. Here’s the process:

1) lift daughter out of car (at the side of Simcoe Road 22) without getting puke everywhere else

2) remove clothes, wipe her down and re-clothe her. Place her in front seat

3) scoop puke off baby seat with bare hands; toss to side of the road

4) remove baby seat from car; clean the actual seat (the puke managed to seep through) with Bounty and wet wipes [By the way this is not sponsored, I just really like Bounty]

5) clean baby seat at the side of the road as best as I can, put seat back in, cover with towel and drive back to Toronto (with the windows open and trying not to be sick myself)

It was pretty disgusting. She’s worth it though isn’t she? I think so!

This is my first post since the launch of the website, and you might be thinking, “If he’s the Do It All Daddy, then why isn’t he blogging often?” I do it ALL…that’s the reason. I’m too busy.

Here’s a prime example of why I’m the Do It All Daddy:

I’m working these crazy European hours – 2 am to 5 pm – out of my home office. By 7 am I’ve already done 5 hours of work, spoken to Presidents, CEOs, VPs, Marketing Directors (all in France). I’ve reprimanded my staff for being late – again! What is it about these youngsters? (but that’s a post for another time)

At about 7:30 [am] I get a distress message from this crazy woman who happens to be my wife. “I need help!” I’m thinking maybe she needs a little ‘you know what,’ but she needs help with the kids. They are (apparently) not cooperating. What I forgot to mention is that it’s been two weeks since I’ve been doing these hours – and I’m dead tired.

So I go upstairs to help her get the kids ready for school and daycare, because for some reason she needs help.

Not only do I get upstairs and the kids have not even started to get ready, but she says to me – after having 5 more hours of sleep than me daily for the last two weeks – “I have a headache, these kids are driving me crazy and I’m hot and sticky. I need a shower now.” Isn’t the headache excuse something you say when I come knockin’ on your door? I guess at 7:30 when we are all in the bathroom it has a whole other meaning.

So she took a 25 minute shower, while I got them ready. In all fairness she picked out their clothes – that’s one thing I can’t do. I made them breakfast, and she came down all ready and moisturized and fresh to start her day.

On the walk to drop the kids off she says, “Man I’m so tired!” – really?!

Need I say more?